you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
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He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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