where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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