A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize
