I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Randomize
