scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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