wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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