Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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