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i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
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