Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
