im so drunk with asians
where?
always
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
