Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
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We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
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Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
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