Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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