i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
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