What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
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