no, he came in my armpit
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
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