you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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