Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Randomize