I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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