I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
this will be a night to untag.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize
