I'm going to jail i love you
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
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