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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me