Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
