Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
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