I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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