If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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