I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
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