He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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