I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
My cat gives me a boner
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
