Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
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