So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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