how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Randomize
