He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize