wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
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