some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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