Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
