So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize
