honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Randomize
