I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
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