My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
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Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
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