all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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