Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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