week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
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