idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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