i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
Church boner. Awkwardddd
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
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