I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
