i may or may not be watching the land before time
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
