Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Randomize
