nut hugger
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
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