Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
