Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Randomize
