i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
she peed on how many people?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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